Updates, Updates.

I just suddenly had the "feel" to blog after quite some time. So YAY.
Here I am.

You know how some people will go all the way to make themselves as free as possible, slack as much as possible and just wish they didn't have any responsibilities at all?
I realize I'm the exact opposite.
Somehow, I like the feeling of keeping myself busy.
Be it having my iPhone in one hand and a cookie in the other,
I HAVE to be doing something.

I have a lot of responsibilities, be it at home, or in school.
Okay, warning here, I'm really not trying to be bhb & go all "Wow I'm the magnificent one with all the responsibilities.." but I've just been doing a lot of thinking lately, like ever since things started to pile up for me and the list of stuff for me to do increased day by day, like an APGP. Yea.

At home, I'm the eldest daughter, the eldest child, the elder sister.
I naturally constantly get nagged by my parents "You have to guide your sisters in their studies.." "You have to teach them manners.." "You have to set a good example so mei mei can follow in your footsteps." Yea I get that A lot.
And frankly speaking, it's not that cool being the oldest sister and having to guide your siblings the whole time.
Like recently, my mum gave me a dressing down when she felt I had been spending too much time at school or outside with my friends especially during such a period when my second sis was going through her prelims.
To be honest, I felt it was rather unfair. I mean, when I was my sister's age, please. Who even was there to guide me along when I needed help?
But then I think about it by myself for awhile, I naturally felt it was unfair of my mum to scold me like that, because I felt I needed to have my own personal space, my own personal time with my friends, but then again, I felt guilty, because I also agree that as an older sis, it was only Right, I spent time coaching my sister as well.
That, for me, is already a huge responsibility at home.

Sometimes, I even have to watch out for my own language and actions. Because, you never know when, one day, your mum would scold your sister for doing something or saying something wrong, only to get a retort of "But jie jie also do that before what."
And I'll just be like "Shit."
Been there, done that.

Okay fine. Being an elder sister definitely also has its perks.
Like for example, sometimes when I do something right, or behave in a right manner, my dad would always go like "See? JX & JY, must follow and learn from da jie, she's being a good example."
& I'll just be like "Mmhmm. *smug face*" HAHAHAHAHA. Yea those moments ftw.

In school, I'm a CT rep and a street i/c for dance.
These may seem like rather minor roles, but ladies and gentlemen, these are definitely not easy roles to handle. Trust me.

However, I AM Thankful for such a supportive and rather cooperative class 1210 <3 .="." nbsp="nbsp" p="p" really.="really.">And OKAY. Thanks also to the really auntie Saikang warrior JJ. HAHAHA.

Apart from these roles, I have to handle my studies well, and outside of curriculum, I also have to juggle learning the Piano.

There was a time, not long ago, (LOL OMG WAIT. Why does the start of this sentence sound like something we normally say on National day? WOOHOO which btw is TOMORROW WOOTS! *Getting in the national day mood ;)*)
AS I WAS SAYING, a classmate of mine recently was quite shocked that I could play the piano (HAHA.) and she said it was so cool that I can dance (Not really, though I'm in the CCA) and play the piano as well. Haha then she said some chim chinese idiom... Okay we'll stop at that.
Yea. So It really ain't easy for me sometimes.

I mean hey, I do get stressed up, ALOT in fact, some people have seen me stressed up before (I'm sorry pals.) and a teacher even said I was like a "Kanchiong spider" -.- So Yeap.
But I don't know, I mean I like that I'm busy in a way that I get to do lots of stuff and...
Maybe I feel important because there are people who trust I'm able to do these things well.
Am I making sense here?
It's just this sense of accomplishment each time I fulfill the task well. The feeling is really exhilarating.

In other words, I think I'm like a workaholic. A littttttle like my Dad I guess.

I also don't like how when I'm not doing stuff, I just.. think. I'll start daydreaming, and thinking.
And sometimes, hah, EVERYTIME in fact, when I start thinking, there's no end to it.
I always over think when I have too much time on my hands.
And I upset myself even more and make myself feel so insecure.
I get so easily insecure sometimes.

That's generally one of the main reasons why I like to be preoccupied I guess.

And I realised I really love it when I have someone nice to talk to.
Someone who is willing to hear me rant, to hear me tell my embarrassing stories, to hear me just talk everything out and laugh, smile or cry along with me. I really like that feeling of just having someone who's willing to do that.

Hahaha I even told my Dad that next time when I can go out to work, I will most probably be looking for jobs which require me to talk non stop all day. Like I told him, if I were given a job facing the compeer 24/7 and doing reports all day long, I would probably DIE of BOREDOM. I would die literally.
& I'm pretty much also set on learning Psychology maybe as a minor in Uni, because I feel that Psychology is a rather interesting and important subject that can be used as a skill in the future. Well, maybe also cause I'm fairly interested in it. Oh who am I kidding. I'm extremely interested in it. HAH.

HAHAHAHA OMG YES. And right, that time, my family went to our club during one of the weekends, and I chanced upon this poster on "Laughing Yoga" sessions. And O.M.G. the fees for such sessions weren't cheap, mind you.
So my mum and I were joking around and I was like: "That's it. This is gonna be my profession in the future. I'll earn BIG BUCKS and the lesson will just be like "Okay class, first, learn how to say "HA!", GOOD. Now say another "HA!". EXCELLENT. Now please repeat the first two words faster. WONDERFUL. Thank you class, you have now finished the Laughing Yoga module, I'm collecting the fee of $80 Thanks!"'
NOT BAD EH?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Hope that kinda made your day for those who are reading this post ;)
Btw, I know my posts are always so long & I'm sorry for being such a windbag! HAHA!

Right. Dinner awaits her majesty *Points at myself* So I shall kindly take my leave.
Ciao!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo WHY IS IT FISH FOR DINNER OMGOMGOMGOMG. YUCK.