It's just one of those nights.

So it's like 11.35pm right now. 

I'm a little sleepy. 

But I just have the feel to blog so here I am.

I think "Once bitten, twice shy" applies to me a lot. 

In a lot of stuff.

You know, I guess that's probably why I've so many insecurities. 

It's like, u know how it feels for something to happen to you because I've been through it before, & ur just so afraid of having to go through it again because it wasn't a good period in your life before. 

Everyone said "just give it another go" and then your heart says in a small whisper "don't. You know u can't handle this."

And then it stops there. 

Haha sometiems I just wish no one would read my blog so it'll really become my personal diary hahaha. I'm just so lazy to write I guess & I type faster too haha so yea.

To people reading my blog, please don't judge me (though I know u kinda will somehow it's difficult not to judge I know.) cause I guess sometimes I need to rant & let things out haha. 

I don't like looking back at my past. Because it makes me feel kinda upset. 

I don't know I mean it's not that I was that unhappy but I guess the more significant events in my past did not go as well. 

Nowadays whenever I'm alone for a long time, or when I'm in for long car rides, I just can't help but think about the past & how some things turned out. I keep wondering & I also have questions, why this why that. 

But I guess I can never rewind time so just let it go.

Alright. I think this post doesn't make sense anyway HAHA. I'm sorry peeps. 

xoxoxoxoxo gotta stop feeling like this. It's so so unhealthy.