I see your halo, really?

Sorry for such a shitty title haha. 

Now somehow that song's just stuck in my head so I had to use it one way or another.

Okay now One way or another by one direction is stuck in my head.

Oh well.

Feeling so low tonight.

Though As are ending, but suddenly it seems as though I won't have any time for myself this holiday. 

I want to have some alone time for myself to just chill on the sofa, to watch TV to play the piano to play with my dog to use my phone, all without having to feel guilty & well, just have some ME time.

But it seems like after As I already have so many, so many things to do.

The moment As end I'd have to get ready for prom then so many other stuff then class chalet, then after prom it would be the Illumi run (YAY) then maybe off to M'sia or I have to find a job.

I feel so suffocated I don't know.

I don't want to feel left out on any of these, I don't want to feel left out on any outings of my class, so I really try my bag to go for all, but well there would be opportunity cost. Having time spent for myself.

I guess I can only have some me time when I'm in M'sia.

But u know I'm just afraid like when I go to M'sia when I come back I'd realise that I've missed out on so many things that the class organized & did.

Haha I don't know it's just this constant nagging uneasy feeling of me feeling left out. I really hate such a feeling so.

Okay I should be heading to bed now.

It's 12.54AM.

Tmr I'd still have to study for physics paper 1 ugh.

C'mon Jiawen u can do this.

Lord help me through all these even though this is a difficult period, please still help me through it. Even after As, constantly show me which is the path I'm supposed to take, the people I can truly trust, & just guiding me all the way, never ever let me do this alone Lord.

Amen. 

xoxoxoxoxo hope. 

P/S: I'm missing these girls so damn badly. Please let's really meet up soon so I can feel better, despite all our conflicting schedules please. 

 

My lock screen is always a picture with these two girls because they always give me a secure feeling, when I look at them I just feel so at ease, like I'm truly, Home. 

So please meet up soon if u girls read this post. <3